Smile - Laven

'"Your nothing, nothing to me." He heard.
Everyone turns. Everyone leaves.
"You were never even a friend…"
"Why?" He asked desperately. "Why must everyone leave?"
"I'm not leaving, I was never there for you…" the voice answered.
"Why…" why….?
The voice echoed in laughter.
"Lavi… why you? Why you too?! I-I…."
"You what? You think I care, Allen?" The voice hurt him deeper, echoing in his mind.
"L-Lavi…."
"Allen…Allen…"
Allen awoke with a start.
"Oh- L-Lavi!" He said staring at the face that hovered above his. "Wh-what is it?"
"I came to see if you were okay, you missed dinner." Lavi noted.
"Oh, did I? I guess I'll get something to eat" Allen said.
"Wait, Allen, it's like 12am, and you… you were crying in your sleep… why were you crying?" Lavi asked grabbing his arm.
"I… I…" Allen stammered.
"You, you said my name…" Lavi pointed out.
Allen his lip and looked away using the arm Lavi wasn't holding to wipe away any tears that had escaped while he was sleeping. Lavi looked down at him, he seemed so fragile. He was usually so strong, but right now he didn't seem like the boy who had saved their lives so many times.
Lavi smiled, "You were crying! Girly tears!" He laughed.
Allen made a face at him, "If I do cry I cry like a man!" Allen yelled, his voice cracking when he said "man". Lavi laughed, lightening up the tense mood.
"So manly…" he laughed, pulling Allen into a hug. Allen gasped as Lavi's arms wrapped around him, taking in his scent of pine and burning wood. The scent was so familiar; it was the scent that surrounded him when the older exorcist jokingly threw his arm around him, or when he walked past him, or fought beside him, and when... when he hugged him in the ark and he felt so far away. He bit down on his bottom lip again, burying his face in Lavi's soft shirt and wrapping his arms around his neck.
"L-Lavi…" Allen mumbled.
"What is it Allen?" he asked quietly.
"N-Nothing" Allen replied, forcing himself to pull away from the older exorcist.
"A-Allen?" Lavi obviously knew that it was not "nothing", "was it your dream…? You know you can tell me…"
Allen made a face, can I tell him? He wondered, can I trust him? Is he really a friend? Or just a Bookman…?
"Allen…" Lavi said again, questioning Allen's hesitation. He had been a bit off since the ark, which was understandable, it was a big deal, but was it something Lavi had done? "Was it me?" He asked.
Allen looked up at him, a bit of shock leaking into his expression, wondering if Lavi read his mind, but then again, he usually did. Lavi, of course, didn't miss the shock in his face and made a face back at him.
"It's something that has to do with the ark isn't it?" Lavi asked, "You've been acting weird ever since then…"
Allen frowned. "I…" Allen hesitated again. Even if he has been my friend all along and it was just Rhode's power that made him say those things in the ark… I doubt he'd like me in the same way…
Lavi sighed and went to sit down on Allen's bed. "I'll tell you a secret if you tell me what's wrong" Lavi bribed. Allen went and nervously sat next to him.
He thought for a second and then looked up into Lavi's Emerald eye. "Fine" he said, his curiosity getting the best of him, "but you go first."
Lavi smiled, he was fine with saying his first, he had meant to tell someone for a while, and he couldn't think of anyone better to tell than Allen, his best friend and the one his secret related to.
"Well, you have to promise not to laugh, not use it against me, and not to let it ruin our friendship." Lavi said, Allen nodded, curiosity now painting his innocent and angelic face. Lavi cleared his throat jokingly. "Well, ahem, you know how I always say 'Strike?'" Allen nodded again, feeling a pang somewhere in him, proof of his rejection. "Well I never mean it" Lavi continued, "I do it only to hide from the old Panda what I really feel."
Allen looked at Lavi, naturally confused, but hope flowed through his veins, hope that Lavi felt the same.
"Your turn" Lavi said smiling.
Allen stared into Lavi's eye, his gaze revealing the bit of hope he felt. "I… was just thinking of the ark," he mumbled, "And how you said we were never your friends… I just had a dream about it" he could feel heat rising to his face.
Lavi looked at him and smiled softly. "I see now, Lenalee told me about everything I said, and about how you jumped in to 'hi ban' to save me." Allen was giving him a look that was begging for him to keep talking, causing Lavi to smile. "I am a Bookman," he continued, "and I did believe that humans were just stupid blots of ink on paper, until I came to the order. I met a lot of people, and realized that humans aren't as stupid as I had once thought. And then I met you, Allen…" Allen blushed a bit at the hint of deeper affection in Lavi's voice as he said 'Allen'.
"E-even if you… really did never think of me as a friend… I-I would still give my everything to protect you." Allen stammered. Lavi looked at his red face in shock. He could feel warmth flood through his veins, he had loved this boy since the time that he first met him, covered in horrible wounds and bandages that he had gained from saving his friends, and he was smiling. It made Lavi smile, to think that he could still smile. And the smile was anything but fake, it was the most innocent and true smile he had ever seen. He was like the moon on a dark night. That unreachable hope that shone so you could keep walking.
"I would do the same for you." Lavi responded smiling, not his usual goofy smile, but a true, soft smile. "And of course I think of you as a friend."
Allen blushed, smiling, he was happy to see that Lavi was at least his friend, he could be lying, but something in Lavi's eye told Allen that he couldn't be lying.
"Aw, your blushing, you cry and blush like a girl~" Lavi laughed, his goofy grin finding its way onto his handsome face as he threw his arm around Allen's shoulder jokingly.
"I am not girly! You- you cry like a girl all the time I bet!" Allen responded defensively, but a smile still on his face.
"I am very manly!" Lavi responded striking a jokingly 'manly' pose. "And I like your little girly traits, they're cute."
Allen blushed. 'Cute' may not be his word of choice, but it was… something.
Lavi smirked, he was hoping he'd get a reaction from the word 'cute', and now that he did he could almost assure that Allen felt the same way about him.
"Blushing again?" He laughed, the leaned down to put his face next to Allen's. "It really is cute though~"
Allen turned a dark crimson, inwardly cursing his red face.
"You know if you turn any redder you're not gana be able to see the scar on your face." Lavi noted softly touching the scar on his face and tracing it's lightning-bolt-like shape with his thumb. Then he leaned in closer and kissed Allen's cheek.
"L-lavi" Allen mumbled in shock. Lavi just smiled in response.
"Something wrong?" he whispered, his lips just centimeters from Allen's so that Allen could feel his warm breath mixing with his own.
"N-none" Allen breathed before meeting Lavi's lips. His kiss was like a shock, spreading heat from his lips and traveling through his body to his toes. He reached up and wrapped his arms around Lavi's neck, wanting to be closer to him. Lavi wrapped his arms around the small of Allen's back and pulled him closer. Allen's lips parted slightly and Lavi took the opportunity to explore his mouth. Allen shuddered at the odd but undeniably amazing feeling that he felt throughout his body. Actually a good feeling…
Lavi pulled away, needing air. He looked at Allen's silver eyes as he pulled away. The way his light eyes and skin and hair reflected in the moonlight from the window made him seem as if he was surrounded by an angelic halo. His eyes were focused so intently on Lavi's, lust showing through them.
"You know we are all alone, if you keep making such cute faces I keep resisting you." Lavi joked.
Allen smirked, his creepy 'I always win at poker' smirk that Lavi found irresistibly sexy. "Never said you had to hold back" he responded, pushing Lavi back onto the bed and leaning over him.
"Dang" was all Lavi could mutter before pulling Allen into another kiss. He momentarily contemplated how far he could go with the younger boy, although he was strong he was also a bit shy, so he wasn't quite sure. He had been with a few girls before, making sure to be caught by the old panda so that he would stop suspecting his real orientation. He'd never done anything with a guy before, he couldn't say he didn't want to though.  His other 48 aliases didn't care about hurting the girls' feelings when he just used them for his own selfish reasons, but this alias did. This alias finally saw humans as humans and saw a certain white-haired boy as more than human, at least in Lavi's eyes.
They pulled away. Allen's eyes in the moonlight seemed to hold a hint of blue.
Blue eyes…
His hair like silver.
Silver armor…
Allen noticed the odd look Lavi was making. A look that showed sadness, but anger. He wondered if he had done something wrong.
"L-lavi? S-should I back off?" Allen asked shyly.
"N-no" Lavi said being torn from his memories and thoughts "I was just thinking of something, sorry."
Allen made a face. His usual innocent and questioning face. Like the one he had made when Lavi first met him.
'You can be friends with someone one day and they can be an Akuma the next, you have to be careful.'
Lavi tried to suppress the memories. His right eye wasn't helping in the least. A scene of a boy with black hair and blue eyes came to mind, his white uniform coated in blood.
Lavi bit his lip, he could feel a lump rising in his throat.
"L-lavi, what's wrong?" Allen asked, sounding worried.
"N-nothing, sorry, it's, it's nothing." He responded, hiding his pain behind a smile.
Lavi thought back. He had given up completely at that point. He stayed silent and composed on the train ride to the rewinding town. Forever a bookman.
'I will ask you this once. Who are you?'
'A bookman… One without a name, one with no need for a heart…'
He saw Allen's angelic face, and labeled him as another human, nothing more. But he had proved to be more than that. Allen was no normal human. He had changed Lavi's heart yet again. Lavi couldn't help but think back to when Allen was thought to be dead. He thought about the card he had kept, and the pain he had felt. He wasn't supposed to feel but he had fallen deeply in love with the younger exorcist. He was so strong and kind-hearted. Two strengths he had that could also be thought of as weaknesses, but for Allen they only made him stronger, they made him live.
"I can tell when your smiles are real…" Allen muttered, sounding upset.
Lavi couldn't help but smile, actually smile. This white haired boy had touched his heart and reached so deeply into his soul that he turned on a switch Lavi had tried to hide away. A switch that jumpstarted his heart and gave him the ability to smile and cry like the human he was, and he was meant to be.
"Allen, I love you" Lavi said, a tear streaking down his face.
Allen grinned in response, "I love you too, Lavi." Their lips softly met again. A small but sure sign of their love for each other. Allen was Lavi's savior, and Lavi was the same for Allen. In all of Allen's pain Lavi was the one who pulled him back together and made him smile again.
Lavi pulled Allen closer to him, pulling him down and switching their positions so that he was over Allen. Lavi pulled him closer, both of them fueled by the passion of their love for each other and their past struggles, wanting only to be closer. Lavi undid the buttons on Allen's shirt kissing his neck and collar bone.
"L-lavi" Allen moaned softly as he ran his hands through Lavi's fiery red hair.
Lavi smiled and kissed Allen's cheek softly, "Yes?" he whispered.
Allen smiled softly, "That smile is real."